The Doctor’s Visit

The funniest LDS joke I’ve ever heard. Brad Wilcox shared this at TOFW today and I was in fits!


A physician had just moved to Utah and was meeting with his first patient in his new clinic. Here’s how the conversation went:

Doctor: “Well, Mrs. Smith, we’ve talked about your high blood pressure and your medications. Are you experiencing any particular stress in your life?”

Patient: “Oh, yes! It’s the Sunbeams. They’re driving me crazy.”

Doctor (surprised): “The sun beams?”

Patient: “Yes. I’ve never had trouble with them before, but this group won’t sit still. They bounce all over the room, and run out the door and down the hall.”

Doctor (reaching for a pen): “Have you told anyone about this?”

Patient: “Of course. I told the president.”

Doctor: “Really! What did the president tell you?”

Patient: “She said Sunbeams are like that. I’m just going to have to learn to deal with them.”

Doctor (concerned that he may be missing something): “I know people who are sensitive to sun beams. Do they cause you a rash or anything?”

Patient (confused): “A rash? No.”

Doctor: “What’s the biggest problem they’re creating?”

Patient: “It’s the noise. They just won’t quit talking.”

Doctor (astonished): “The sun beams are talking to you?”

Patient: “Well, yes. But mostly they talk to each other.”

Doctor (scribbling furiously in the chart): “I see. Can anyone else hear them talking?”

Patient (after a moment of stunned silence): “You’re not LDS, are you?” 

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